It’s simply the time it is here as I sit here thinking, continually glancing up at the clock in the upper right hand corner of my screen, knowing I need to make my way home eventually.It’s a creative title isn’t it?  But what can I say, only that it’s 1:09 in the morning and it is quiet.  The rain has stopped, there is only the sound of a street cleaner going by, morning will be approaching soon, and all I can do is sit on this couch thinking.

I had an interesting conversation with a good friend of mine today about unrequited love and how that affects the heart.  I think there have been times when we all faced this dilemma at some point in our lives.  We can remember the way it felt and  can even recall the declarations we made to protect our hearts from such a Love.  We would rather choose to put on our running shoes than to feel that again.  But what if we just stopped…stopped running…stopped living in old habits, and faced whatever we need to face.  What if we get hurt again, which is a part of life… but does that change the character of God or diminish His power?  Does it strip away any of our worth?  No.  I think of Lucia, who time after time pushed me away in fear.  But everyday I sat with her.  I didn’t leave, but simply sat with her.  I could have given up, it was obvious she wanted nothing from me, but as much as it hurt, I couldn’t stop loving her.  If anything to show her a glimpse of Love that doesn’t take.  And eventually she took my hand.   Even if she didn’t, the Love I have for her wouldn’t waiver.  Was it difficult?  Absolutely!  It wasn’t easy.  But it was real.

Can I say now, that I always Love like this?  No.  But I’m learning.  And  now I need to stop, stop running, stop thinking, and stop looking at the clock.  It’s 1:39.  I need to sleep, to rest, for tomorrow is another day…

2 thoughts on “1:09

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