Step by Step and Jump.

I’m just going to say it…  I’m in over my head.  Which for me is a good thing, a great thing actually.  There are two parts to me.  One is a very emotional part.  There are moments where my emotions just take over.  I normally have to be aware of that.  Then, there is the part where I turn off all emotion and go to the other extreme of over thinking things, letting my mind take off on different paths of thoughts that, let’s be honest, isn’t always the best either.  Yes, balance is definitely key for me…

But here I am over my head…  I’ve taken a big jump this year in all areas of my life really, my work with kids, relationships, etc.  No more settling for what I know or satisfied with where I was, but pushing for more.  The life I want to live is one that I can’t handle on my own, and for too long, I’ve only gone so far.

This isn’t an excuse for the lack in blogging, but it is me being real with where I am.  It’s about time I took on something more than I can handle by myself.  And honestly, though it can be overwhelming at times, trust in Him is growing, especially when it comes to fragile parts of my life and fear.

I read a commonly quoted Proverb today, 16:9 -The heart of man plans his way, but the LORD establishes his steps.

Step by step and then Jump.  It is a decision every step of the way.  I have to make a decision to take each step.  And when it came time to jump, I had to decide to do it.  The thing I sometimes forget in regards to relationship with God is that a relationship is a commitment on both sides.  He provides and His commitment to me doesn’t waiver… mine on the other hand is a bit shaky at times.

And the end of the day, the question is, What am I trusting Him with?  It’s a decision.  It’s following through.  And it’s jumping in, trusting that whatever happens, He’s still there and I’ll keep going…