Uniquely Me…

Toys are poured out on the floor and balls are scattered across the room as the bins that used to hold them are no where to be found.  This is my view.  And it is beautiful…

You see, my view has changed…

Oh how comparison can steal us of our joy and cause us to lose sight of the unique way we were created and the great responsibility we have been given as women, as mothers!

I’m not anywhere close to being a mom like June Cleaver (My apologies for the younger generations who may not know who that is), and my children are not quiet, nor calm, but rather quite adventurous climbers, explorers, loud, messy, and ready to be creative.  I’ve fallen short trying to be the mom I’ve seen some other women be, wondering why it was not as easy for me.  But the truth was that I wasn’t being me.  And in that frustration I had to let it all go.  I let go of the expectations of what I thought I should be as a mother.  It bound me to a life of disappointment and to feeling trapped always striving to reach a level that just was not me.  I looked at the mess I saw and changed my perspective…I became free…

Free to embrace the woman I am.
Free to embrace the uniqueness and beauty of my own children.
Free to embrace the unique characteristics I have to guide my children in the way only I CAN.
Free to grow as a mother, but also in my own passions.
Free to be a mom who lives with a lighter heart, celebrates creativity, embraces mistakes as times for us to learn and grow together.
Free to be ME.

You see the mess I saw was caused because my children were chasing each other with the bins on their heads, laughing, being friends, and learning how to play together…  I want to foster that type of environment of creativity and exploration.  It was a beautiful sight.  I want more of these memories…the moments where they feel free to be who God created them to be…full of energy, life, Love!

bucket head

You are unique!  You are beautiful!  You are free to be YOU!

Psalm 139:14
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

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When Ordinary is Extraordinary

During this transition, I’ve felt so much love from my husband, my family, my friends and life here is beginning to take shape.  I’m meeting friends, settling into our home, and discovering more about this area and ways to get involved.

And in it all, I’m learning thankfulness… thankfulness for even the ordinary.  What do I mean?

The word, ordinary, is defined as something that is uninteresting, that has no special or distinct features.  So what is ordinary?  Isn’t that a matter of perspective?  What might seem uninteresting to me, could be special to someone else.  My sister has actually taught me a lot about thankfulness.  To see life in a different way, to see and be thankful for where you are, what you have, and what is in front of you is powerful.  It changes the way you live.  It opens up awareness to opportunities that you otherwise would not have seen.  It changes the thought, what do I need, to what can I give.

To me, there is something special about the ordinary.

In Acts, I’m learning about Peter and John as they were filled with the Holy Spirit and performed miracles in the name of Jesus.  Acts 4:13 states, “When they (Sanhedrin) saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus.”

Here Peter and John are not described as great, powerful men…but ordinary.  Yet, they are filled with the Spirit, performing miracles and boldly declaring truth in the name of Jesus.  Seems extraordinary to me!

When lies tell you, you are nothing but ordinary, that there is nothing special about you, that there is nothing you have to offer, remember, God has a different perspective and can use you daily, in any moment, in any simple act of love, the ordinary is extraordinary.  And for that I’m thankful!

“Saruman believes it is only great power that can hold evil in check, but that is not what I have found. I found it is the small everyday deeds of ordinary folk that keep the darkness at bay. Small acts of kindness and love.” (Gandalf)  ~J.R.R Tolkien, The Hobbit

Kind Sentiments or Purposeful Action…

How are you living?

I’ve really been thinking a lot about life in the Spirit lately.  Being open to the Spirit’s guidance and the authority given to us as we live out each day.  For too long, I believe, I’ve kept life and life in the spirit separate.  I’ve doubted the power and authority in me, and can see how that has played out in my actions and life. 

What should be purposeful action, has simply become, kind sentiments.

Thankfully, God can still use us where we are at, because honestly, there is timidity in me…not so much humbleness, but timidity.  There have been several moments and examples lately proving this, but one I want to share took place while I was teaching. 

My students were going through their normal routine, review of vocabulary, computer work, games, and then entered a gentleman who was just waiting for his friends.  He sat in my class to wait, and as the students recognized his presence, their actions changed.  They stopped paying attention and wanted to “show off” for him.  They were distracted and I realized it, but I figured I could manage, even though I knew it wasn’t the best learning environment for them.  It continued to progress more and more and I knew I had to gain control and ask the gentleman to leave so that the children could once again focus.  Yet, I approached him not in a confident manner, as someone who has taught them for a year and knew what was best for them to learn, but I approached him with timidity, apologizing for inconveniencing him because I had to ask him to leave.  I have authority in my classroom and yet, I was like a 5-year old girl looking for approval.

ImageDon’t get me wrong, I don’t always live like this, but lately these moments have weighed on my mind.  They have made me think about how much I truly believe in the authority that is in me.

Even as I pray for my students or even for friends and family, how much authority am I praying with?

The guidance and direction of the Spirit, the authority that is within us…there is purpose for that.  And with that authority comes responsibility.  When I pray for my students, it’s with purpose, and I must believe that something changes for the better.  When the spirit directs my path or actions, it’s with purpose, and I must be aware and open to that. 

So much to learn, but thankful for each lesson learned…

Open

I’m sitting here wondering what to write next.  How can I wrap up my time in Morocco in a clean concise way?  The experiences shared, I hope speak for themselves.  The children I met remain in my thoughts and heart.  They always have.  They always will.  But there are so many more, not just in Morocco, but here in Spain, as well as Asia, as well as South America, as well as the United States.  All around the world, children can be found living in the streets.  And yet, I can’t be everywhere.  I can’t take food and a futbol traveling around.  Would I?  Yes, if that’s what I believe I was to do.  But honestly, though GOD used my simple offerings for such good, I know more needs to be done.  And I refuse to sit back and do nothing.  For HE has my all.

Teams of people are needed to unite against such injustice of innocence.   I’m not going to tell you that I have definite and finite plans of how all this looks.  I can’t tell you that I know what all the next steps are.  But I do know that GOD has asked me to be OPEN, open to the many ways this could look.  And it is through this openness that I have the excitement and peace to share what I do know…

I’m here.

I’m here to reach out to the street children in Spain.  I’m here to reach out to the street children in Morocco.  I’m here to raise up and train leaders to go.  I’m here to learn what these children need, to give all that I have, to trust in GOD who has placed the precious hearts, faces, and identities of such children on my heart, knowing that I won’t stop, that I won’t stop fighting for these children, loving these children, teaching these children, and growing a family who understands more and more what love is.

Is it a big task?  No.  It’s an amazing life!

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